I don't know why, but most folks just dont make good gravy. When invited to dine at friends homes, I like to be fed from the primary food groups; namely meat, potatoes and gravy. While the meat and potatoes usually pass muster, the gravy, if served at all, tends to be a bit lacking. My goal in disseminating these here instructions is to improve my chances of having edible gravy where ever I go to sponge; err, eat. I'm here to save the world from weak thin gravy. Just you follow along with me and you will soon become known as an expert in the preparation of genuine stick-to-the-ribs Central American ( Missouri / Kansas ) Style Gravy.

Gravy can be made using just about any kind of grease or oil, flour, salt, pepper and milk. It can be eaten with just about everything. It is a meal-maker, not a budget breaker. It is a food for all seasons. Just remember, like good ole Bill says, you can trust me. When you follow these directions you will never be accused of making 'thin' watery gravy (consider yourself insulted if someone calls it a sauce). And so, without further eloquence, let us begin...

Starting with first things first, the ideal beginning is to have some meat drippings from a roasted or fried anything. I find the best gravy is made in the pan that was used to roast meat. Poultry, such as turkey, seems to make the best gravy, although a good pork roast doesn't do all that bad either. My favorite is the drippings left after roasting a turkey. Gravy can even be made from vegetable oil, margarine or butter, with flavor being supplied by some such additive as chicken or beef bullion. Be forewarned that some meats, like ground beef, leave a rather tasteless grease. Even so, additional ingredients and flavoring can be added to save the day. I normally use bullion rather than salt when making gravy from anything other than good (flavorful) pan drippings from a roast.

You should make the gravy right in the pan used to roast or fry your meat. This produces the best results because the pan contains all the caramelized greases and other things like bits of stuffing that has fallen out of the bird. If you try to transfer the drippings to a more handy container, it may really foul things up. That real tasty coating on the pan or skillet won't get into the roux. When you make your roux (pronounced 'roo'; a mixture of flour and oils cooked together and used as a thickening), do it in the original roasting/frying pan. Then, if you must, transfer it to another container prior to finishing up the gravy.

Be sure to let your roasting/frying pan cool down before doing much of anything. Letting the pan cool down makes it is easier to handle and insures that the flour doesn't get scorched. When it is cool enough to handle, add sufficient flour to prepare an oily roux. Now, this next item is important. The more flour added, the weaker will be the flavor of the gravy because you will have to use more liquid (milk). The best mixture, after you have added the flour and cooked and mixed it well, will have some small amount of visible liquid oil/grease in it. The cooked roux, like the cooled gravy, should not stick to the pan. If it does, you are probably putting in too much flour and or have not cooked it long enough.

Cook the roux over low to medium heat, stirring -- scraping -- while mashing down firmly. This catches up all the flavor from the pan and breaks up the solid bits. Add black pepper (I use a copious amount) and bullion or salt to taste. Cook the roux until the flour has been fully cooked (when it is done you won't be able to taste the flour). The time to flavor taste the roux is while cooking it. If the roux doesn't taste good, the gravy doesn't stand a chance. If you need to, the time to add additional flavoring is now, while you are finishing up the roux. Don't wait until after the gravy has been made. Remember; Roux that doesn't taste good will make gravy that doesn't taste good, and weak tasting roux will make tasteless gravy.

When the roux is done, add your milk all at once to the pan. If the milk is added slowly, the mixture will tend to cook where the milk contacts the hot roux and it will form glumps ( globs / blobs / lumps ) on the bottom of the pan. Adding the milk all at once cools the roux and pan, allowing you time to stir and blend the mixture prior to it beginning to thicken. How much milk should you use? It depends on how thick you want the gravy to be when you are done. I use about six times more milk, by volume, than I have roux. In any case, you should add a little less milk than you think you will need. Have additional milk handy so you can add more if the gravy starts to get too thick (I usually start with 1/2 gallon, keeping another 1/2 gallon handy -- why make a small batch when it's just as easy to go hog-wild!).

After the milk has been added and the mixture stirred, and after the consistency has evened out, turn the heat to high and start stirring in earnest, wiping the bottom and sides of the pan constantly. I use a spatula for this. It cleans the bottom well and doesn't allow a build up of thickened gravy on any surface. Using a high fire allows you to finish quicker. Be careful not to scorch the bottom, though. The higher the fire, the faster you must stir to keep hot spots from developing. A low fire doesn't do anything for you because you still have to stir regularly to keep the bottom layer from turning into a big glob. So turn up the heat and get it over with as fast as you can. It doesn't take more than a very few minutes.

As you cook your gravy, add more milk when necessary and stir, stir, stir (quickly now, or the bottom layer will thicken into glumps). As it cooks, the gravy will thicken. In fact, because it will all reach cooking temperature at the same time, when it starts to thicken it will thicken quickly. If you are going to need more milk, do it as soon as you see that the gravy will be too thick. Don't wait for your gravy to thicken all the way through prior to adding more milk. If the bottom starts to get out of hand, that is the time to turn down the heat some and or speed up your stirring. Remember, don't wait until the mixture has reached an overall too-thick consistency prior to adding more milk. Just bring it up to 'reasonably thick' and then hold it there by adding small amounts of milk while you stir.

The amount of milk in the final mixture, to obtain thick yet fully cooked gravy, is not overly critical. Too little milk and the mixture will be too thick when fully cooked. If you stop it from thickening by removing it from the heat, it will not be fully cooked and will taste pastey. Add too much milk and your gravy will start to lose flavor and become more like a yucky sauce instead of a good wholesome gravy. The final consistency has been reached when the gravy starts to boil. When it starts to boil, turn the heat all the way to the lowest setting you have. Stir some more till the pan cools a bit, then leave it on a very low simmer until you are ready to serve. If a spoon will almost stand up in it, then it is just about right!

Notes:

• If you plan to make copious amounts of gravy for that bunch of hungry varmints (guests), be sure to be generous when you baste your roasting meat. I use plenty of soft squeeze bottle margarine, usually a full pound on a 20 pound turkey. Really makes the roux/gravy something special. And all that spilled stuffing doesn't hurt a darned bit either. Leave it in there and mash it up when making the roux!
• If you are making sausage or hamburger gravy to put over potatoes, bread, biscuits or the like, put the meat in a skillet and cover over with water. Boil away the water then thoroughly brown the meat in the grease that remains. These gravies usually require additional flavoring. I Like to add lots of black pepper, chopped onions and/or green peppers to the cooking meat. Remove the meat with a slotted spoon, leaving the grease, then make the roux/gravy as above. Stir the meat back into the gravy after you have reduced the gravy to a simmer. This is Good stuff!
• Additional flavor can be added using a little powdered coffee (red-eye gravy!), powdered red cayenne pepper (red iye yi yi! gravy), chopped and well sautéed onions (frenchly gravy), etc. Be sure to add these to the grease or roux and flavor test the result prior to adding the milk. The roux must taste right before going on with the final cooking.
• If a large amount of roux has been prepared, those amounts in excess of that needed for today's meal can be frozen for later use. When I want to use it, I thaw it in the microwave. It keeps for months, and microwave heating doesn't seem to hurt it a bit.